I went for my long-awaited teeth cleaning appointment this afternoon. It was with the special care dentistry team at Kings. I’d been referred to this team because my tics have become too difficult for my existing dentist to manage.

Leftwing Idiot came with me and while we were in the waiting room an older woman walked in and started talking to a receptionist. We noticed she was wearing a Blue Peter badge. I fought to control my tics but didn’t manage it for long:

“I’ve got a Blue Peter badge in Pig Porn.”
“Hands up if you’ve got a ship on you.”

Luckily I was soon called through. The dentist, his assistant and two dental nurses were lovely, welcoming and reassuring. My own dentist had felt I needed to be sedated, but the specialist wanted to see if laughing gas would be sufficient to subdue my tics, because if it did it would make future treatment much easier.

I breathed the gas in through a mask with the dentist gradually increasing the amount of nitrous oxide, but I continued making noises and moving around with the same force. He kept asking how I felt and my answer didn’t change, “Relaxed, but I don’t think I’m any stiller.” After several increases, my tics became less complex and I started making the loud squawk I often make when I’m going to sleep. But I was still moving about a lot.

In spite of this, they decided to have a go at cleaning my teeth. The dental nurse held my forehead and Leftwing Idiot held my hands and legs.

During the course of cleaning, one of my fillings came out, which was an extra problem they had to fix.

I continued to tic throughout the treatment:

“Who likes Dizzy Rascal?”
“Who wants a whiskey?”

They all laughed and the dentist said, “I’ll definitely need a glass of wine this evening.”

At one point I started to feel horrible and like I was passing out. I managed to indicate that I wasn’t OK and that I felt very heavy. They stopped the gas and gave me pure oxygen.

We did the rest of the treatment without gas, with Leftwing Idiot and the dental team holding me still. The dentist fixed my broken filling which now looks better than it did before.

The whole process lasted about an hour and I was very relieved when it was done. When it was all over the dentist said, ‘We won’t do it that way again.’