This afternoon I was at a meeting and halfway through I became very uncomfortable. Although I wasn’t having a ‘ticcing fit’ I was moving around a lot. Leftwing Idiot, who was supporting me, was sitting near me but not next to me. He noticed my discomfort and came to sit beside me, helping me keep still by holding my hands and arms.

All pretty standard so far. But when he got up he discovered he’d been sitting on a chocolate biscuit. Fortunately for him it had been face down so his trousers weren’t a chocolaty mess, but the chair wasn’t so lucky. It was biscuit carnage.

Leftwing Idiot explained what had happened to someone from the venue and they were very nice about it, and surprisingly it didn’t send my tics crazy. Well, at least not immediately.

But ever since, I’ve been ticcing “Don’t sit on a biscuit!”. Sensible advice when directed at people, slightly less so when directed at the lamp-post.