Tonight, while discussing what we were going to have for dinner, Leftwing Idiot said he wanted some cake. This resulted in 20 minutes of:

“Sponge cake, Bob Pants.”

“Champagne Bob, Square Pants.”

“Bob, Bob, Bob, Bob Pants.”

I have no particularly strong interest in Sponge Bob.…

Over breakfast in a greasy-spoon and in the company of some very hung-over humans, I offered some technical computer advice to no one in particular:

“Overclock your soul.”

I was clearly:

“Wrecked on the rocks in my mind.”

But:

“I gave a spirited performance in my mind.”…

I’m back from my last day at work. I’ve been here for three years and although I’m excited about my new job, I’ve met and worked with loads of amazing people and saying goodbye to them was difficult.

My tics have rarely been mentioned by my colleagues or the families I work with, but strangely they came up a few times today with different people.…

Leftwing Idiot and I were having dinner at a café tonight. I was drinking grapefruit juice through a straw so I didn’t need to worry about lifting the glass.

While we were eating I accidentally flicked the straw and splashed grapefruit juice in my eyes which made me squeal.…

I’m going to have a couple of weeks off between jobs. I’m not going away but I’m planning to do a few nice things around here. I’ve got tickets to see Jerusalem, a play by Jez Butterworth I’ve wanted to see for ages.…

It’s Fat Sister’s birthday so we went out for a mid-week drink. We’ll celebrate properly at the weekend. I met a couple of Fat Sister’s medical colleagues for the first time and one of them kept looking at me strangely. Fat Sister clocked this and said “Shit, sorry, didn’t I mention my sister has Tourettes?”…

My friends understand Tourettes and know I can’t stop my tics. Even so, quite often they’ll still say, “stop it.” This mainly happens when I’m doing something damaging, like hitting myself.

It’s usually followed up by something like “I guess you’ve never thought of that.”…

Tonight I ticced and my phone flew down the bus I was on. It brushed the arm of a young man sitting a few seats in front of me and as I went to get it I apologised and said I hoped his arm was as sturdy as my phone and that this wasn’t the first time I’d tested its toughness.…

I was sitting outside a pub tonight with my friend Kyle when a passing stranger saw me and stopped. “Oh my God, it’s you,” he said. I’d started rifling through my mind trying to identify him when he told me “I thumped a youth for you the other day.”…

I’m crazy busy handing over the support of all the families on my caseload to my colleagues before I leave my job. I’m keen to make sure I don’t miss anything that needs to be done.

I’m also going to visit all the children and families I’ve worked with to say goodbye.…