“I’m a stone masquerading as a person.”

Maybe I could be a spy after all.

I’m going to share thirty minutes of my day through the reactions I’ve encountered along the way.

3.00pm: I popped to the shops during my lunch break to pick up some plasters to protect the my knuckles from the wear and tear they’re currently suffering from the tic that means that I bang my chest.…

“God’s washing your mum’s hair.”

I lost my wallet this evening and what surprised me was that the first call I made after cancelling my bank cards was to order a replacement Tourettes identity card from Tourettes Action. This card confirms I have Tourettes, and gives me something I can show if I’m challenged about my behaviour.…

“I have a flat face…”

“…like a goat…”

“…in a head-on collision with a man.”

“Go and Hoover above your life.”

“Everybody needs a squirrel wearing leggings in their life.”

This evening, while talking about forthcoming films with Laura, we discussed whether it was fair on other people for me to go to the cinema. The impact of Tourettes on other people is something I’m very aware of. I constantly assess the effect that my presence can have on other people.…

The long-weekend got off to a relaxing start this evening when I had dinner with Leftwing Idiot and our friend Keir. The meal was interrupted for a moment when I tipped a glass of water over my head. Later Fat Sister and a drunk King Russell joined us.…

A close friend and former flatmate gave birth to her first child today. During a meal for my birthday I’d ticced “Hannah’s pregnant”. She denied this at the time and continues to assert that she wasn’t pregnant, or at least didn’t know she was, at the time of my announcement.…