I’m at Leftwing Idiot’s flat, and we’ve just had something to eat. While he’s on the phone, I thought I’d quickly write down what just happened in the kitchen.

We were making dinner and he was chopping up the vegetables – something I can’t do safely because of my tics. As I passed him an onion to slice, I ticced and hit him on the side of the head with it.

He made a massive fuss, and I suspect it might be a while before he forgets that I lamped him with an onion.