I glanced up from my computer earlier to find Fat Sister pointing at a packet of biscuits on the living-room table and King Russell pointing at me. I was puzzled by this until Fat Sister said, “You just ticced ‘point to the biscuit’.” King Russell wanted to know who was right. Did I mean me or did I mean the biscuits on the table?

“Who knows? I just issue the instructions, you’d have to apply to Tourettes for an adjudication.”