When I popped out to get some milk earlier there was a police van on the street outside the lair. As I walked past, swearing and shouting “Biscuit”, an officer who was searching someone turned and looked me up and down.…

I’ve written lots of serious entries recently. Tourettes does bring challenges but my tics don’t let things stay serious for too long. Tonight they seemed even more abstract than usual:

“I fucked a kissing gate.”

“Key a llama with a biscuit.”…

Ruth texted me earlier to ask if I wanted to join her and some mates for a drink tonight. The only thing that put me off was the journey. I wasn’t sure if I could face travelling across London, especially after last weekend.…

About six months ago I wrote about the return of a biting tic that I’ve had on and off since I was a kid. It didn’t stay for long last time, but it’s re-emerged in the last week or two and I’m biting my hand and arm frequently.…

By my desk at work there’s a safe. I don’t have to use it very often, but I check that it’s locked many times a day. I do this out of habit. I’ve always been slightly obsessive about checking things, but it’s not as bad now as when I was younger.…

I’ve just got home from a great evening with Ruth. After what happened at the weekend I was a bit nervous about travelling alone. So it was with trepidation that I went down into the tube. But I needn’t have worried because the journey turned out to be a lovely conversation relay.…

At the start of the year I went to see my dentist to have my teeth cleaned and scaled. He decided to refer me to the local dental hospital because my tics were making it pretty tricky for him to do very much.…

“I hold my own with gibberish. I hold hands with donkeys.”

I’ve had a pretty full-on day. A summary of it would look a bit like this:

Travelling, laughing, banging, confronting, sobbing, regrouping, eating, reflecting, relaxing.

But I suppose as a blogger I should put in a bit more detail, so here goes.…

Just in case you thought my tics had moved away from the subject of Christmas, here’s a selection of new festive tics for March:

“Happy Christmas Harry Enfield.”

“Buck up Christmas tree.”

“You’re under arrest on suspicion of being a Christmas tree.”