My best friend Laura’s ten-month-old daughter Ruby is being baptised today and I’ve been really looking forward to it. Initially I’d been concerned about my tics interrupting and spoiling the occasion, but Laura wasn’t worried. She’d prepared the priest and made sure the church was accessible.

My tics had been preparing too. In the last couple of weeks they’ve come up with:

“Ruby loves sin.”
“The devil wears Pampers.”
“Laura’s not a Catholic, she’s a sombrero.”

Whether any of these would’ve emerged during the service will remain a mystery.

Sadly I’m not going after all as I’m still recovering from the tonsillitis that’s knocked me out this week.