I’ve got curly hair, but when it’s wet it’s straight. As a child I wanted straight hair, and when I got out of the bath I’d sit and hold the ends of my hair, hoping to stop it curling up again.

For the last few days I’ve gone through a similarly pointless battle each time I’ve woken up. When I’m asleep my hands, which inexplicably became taut and locked-up on Boxing Day, become relaxed. When I wake up they’re supple and compliant (as compliant as my hands ever are). But within minutes my thumbs start pushing towards my palms and then, within half an hour, my hands and wrists become completely rigid.

No matter how inevitable this is, I spend those few minutes hoping that it won’t happen, as I watch for the moment when my straight hands start to curl again.