It’s the Conservative Party conference this week and it’s been all over the news.

This afternoon Prime Minister Boris Johnson gave a speech about ‘levelling up’. I’m not sure what this means for the country and I’m fairly sure Boris doesn’t either, but I do know what it means for my tics:

“Boris Johnson levelling up with stilts made of shit.”
“Boris Johnson levelling up lies since 95.”
“Boris Johnson levelling up like a cowboy builder with a glue gun.”

I’ve always found it intriguing how my tics pick up on certain phrases
and levelling up wasn’t the only one from Boris’s speech that caught their attention.

I’ve been shouting at the lamp-post all evening about ‘building back better’, including:

“Build Back Biscuit.”
“Build Back Basil.”
“Build Back Britain but without lamp-posts.’
“Build Boris back to the fridge.”
“Build Back Boris with Buses of Latin and lies.”

As far I’m concerned this all makes as much sense as anything Boris actually said!