At Touretteshero, right from the outset, we took the decision to focus exclusively on my tics and not invite contributions from other people for the website. We did this to make sure each tic was authentic and not simply made up for comic effect.

Other Tourettes organisations have been blighted by people pretending to have tics, phoning up and leaving rude messages thinking they were being incredibly funny and original.

This is something we’ve been keen to avoid and so far we’ve done a pretty good job.

All that being said, it hasn’t stopped Leftwing Idiot trying to come up with tics of his own.

Every so often he’ll blurt something out hoping for my approval – something this course of action rarely gets, certainly from my tics anyway.

He’s adamant that he doesn’t ‘think them up’ and instead tries to let them form in his brain naturally, but it’s always hard to tell what’s going on up there. Here are some recent examples, so you can judge for yourself:

“Worm bank.”
“Butterfly hips.”
“Light green lizard queen.”
“Chip butty retirement scheme.”
“Pissant silversmith potato farm.”
“Kevin Keegan Armpit Pyjama Party.”

If I’m honest, I’m pretty impressed, just don’t tell him that.

Festive Outburst

“Who’s headbutting Christmas?”