In the past few weeks summer’s at last swung into action, and as we race towards August it’s time for another Tourettes-inspired horoscope.

Here are your predictions, mighty Leos, for your lion hearts and your hedgehog heads.

I’m intrigued by the idea of a “Bank badger” – I’d love to see some artists’ impressions of what one might look like. Perhaps I should ask the Wildlife Trust to get on the case and investigate whether badgers do in fact have a flair for finance.

I’ve also been giving a lot of thought to numbers that look like Hull and here’s what I’ve come up with:

1      1 1
17 0 1 1
Hull

00000007
0000007
000007
The Deep Aquarium Hull

.        1
.     000
00000000
1                 1
1                 1
Queen Victoria Square Hull

Perhaps, Leo, you should stick to 88.4.4.4.5 as your lucky number after all – it seems more straightforward than finding a number that looks anything like a northern city.

Please pass all this wisdom on to the Lions in your life, and I’ll see you next month for Leftwing Idiot’s sign – Virgo.