As I was leaving work tonight I noticed a horizontal scratch on my cheek that hadn’t been there at lunch time. I’ve discovered several other mystery marks over the last few months in exactly the same place, but I have no idea how they’re getting there.

I mentioned this to Fat Sister when I got home. She looked at my face and said, “You also have a black eye.” I didn’t believe her and tried to wipe it away, thinking it was just some dirt. After a careful scrub I conceded that it was indeed a black eye.

I haven’t got a clue how this happened. I bash my face a lot but I tend to know immediately if I’ve actually hurt myself. It’s disconcerting not knowing how these injuries occur.

It could be because:

“I had a face-off with an omelette in 1946.”