I was hanging out with Leftwing Idiot and Kyle at work today. The three of us go back a long way and we have a well-established history of doing silly voices together.

On our way back from lunch it was Leftwing Idiot’s turn – I can’t remember exactly what he was saying but I suddenly noticed he sounded a lot like Nina Conti’s Monkey! He noticed it too, and after a quick practice he got it more or less spot on and started talking to me as if he were Monkey.

He was clearly surprised himself by this newfound skill and was showing off. But his pleasure was short-lived – my tics overreacted massively to hearing this strangely familiar voice coming unexpectedly from him, and I started flapping around wildly in my chair.

After I’d spun out of control for a third time, Kyle, who was pushing me, refused to go any further until Leftwing Idiot stopped – which he did, slowly and reluctantly.

I had a wonderful time meeting Monkey earlier this year and seeing him and Nina perform at Edinburgh during the Fringe Festival. But nothing prepared me for hearing his voice popping out of Leftwing Idiot’s mouth this afternoon. But much to my relief it was my tics that had the last word.

Festive Outburst

“Third donkey on the left has an igloo hat.”